What to Do When Cuddling is All She Wants

Many women lose their desire for sex; but retain the desire to cuddle. The desire for this comes from feelings of tenderness. Feelings of tenderness are different from sexual desire or love.

For both men and women, feelings of tenderness develop as an infant. The feelings of tenderness are directed towards parents or other caregivers. These feelings come from having basic needs fulfilled. As a grownup, feelings of tenderness come about in the same manner; when her basic needs are met.

Feelings of sexual desire also develop as an infant. Desire may or may not be present when she has feelings of tenderness. Many men become confused and frustrated by this. They mistake her feelings of tenderness for signs of sexual desire. Responding to those feelings will not create a desire for sex.

Love is can be confused with tenderness. Love is defined as a willingness to sacrifice for your partner. It can be measured by what she has given up in the past, and is still willing to give up in the future. Love is not measured by what she is given.

If she wants to cuddle, she is telling you that her very basic needs have been met. It doesn't mean that she is in love, much less wants sex. When she wants to cuddle, expressions of love and sexual desire may have to wait for another time. If all she ever wants to do is cuddle, sexual desire and love may be lacking in the relationship. Make sure to understand and talk openly with her.